Skipress - Index

Skipress - SkiPress Canada Vol.22 No.4 - Index

MOUNTAIN GIRL BY BETH JAHNIGEN
TERMINAL
Velocity
A big night at the bar can have serious consequences on your
ability to snag the fi rst chair the next morning. But as with other
dangerous sports, the method you employ when hitting the town
can limit the risks. Or increase them. Mountain Girl explains….
Looking across the crowded bar, a buzzed but coherent ski bum makes eye
contact with his glassy-eyed and slurring buddy, checks his watch, then
reaches across his chest to pull an invisible rip-cord. As
his imaginary parachute opens, he grabs hold of the
cord and waves goodbye as his friend continues to
plummet downward into drunken oblivion.
Mission accomplished. The dedicated powderhound
sinks to a soft landing in his bed, able make it to the hill
for fi rst tracks the following day. His friends are lucky if they’re
up in time for an Egg McMuffi n before noon.
Like skydiving, partying the night before a powder day carries
inherent risks. But the better your judgment at the shank of the evening,
the more secure your ski experience the next day.
There are three approaches, varying with how much you’re willing to risk.
And how much snow they’re predicting overnight.
1. Solo Freefall. This is the most dangerous method, as it relies solely on
sheer discipline to pull the cord at the appropriate time, no matter how
much fun you’re having at that moment. Willpower, something always in
short supply, can completely desappear when mixed with alcohol. With
each drink ordered past the appointed hour, the closer you come to slamming
into the ground headfi rst. Literally.
2. Tandem Jump. a.k.a. The Buddy System. You hit the bar with your friend,
agreeing that you’re going to keep each other out of trouble. It’s the most
popular approach because you don’t have to take full responsibility if you
don’t open your chute on time. The downside? If your buddy blows it, you’re
going down too.
3. Static Line. In skydiving, this means your parachute is deployed automatically
as you jump out of the plane. It ensures that no matter what you
want to do, you are not going to fall more than a few seconds before the
chute catches you. When applied to going out, it means you take precautions
that will stop you, or at least deter you, from turning Happy Hour into an
All-Nighter. Stick a $20 in your pocket and leave the credit cards at home.
If nothing else, searching for someone to buy you a cocktail will at least
slow your fall.
Of course, the best way to make sure you make it safely to the
front of the liftline in one piece is to not go out at all. But what’s
dangerous — or fun — about that?
14 THE SPRING SKIING ISSUE 2008
Illustration: Zela Lobb
Like skydiving,
partying the night
before a powder day
carries inherent risks.
more mountain girl on skipressworld.com